Summer at San Gold

Kourtney Kerelation provides a piquant account of her time spent working at San Gold in verse form.

For the summer months

I needed a good job

I’m not a bit Italian

So I couldn’t join a mob

 

I have a huge father

So I couldn’t be a stripper

So I came to San Gold

To be your guys’ nipper

 

They put me with my father

And a lot of other men

There’s Derek, Ron and Angel

Nelson, Pony and Len

 

They put me with some Newfie

To show me around the site

It was hard to understand him

Because he doesn’t say his words right

 

He showed me what I was driving

A tractor called a cat

Said we were headin’ to the ‘inge

And to remember my ‘ard ‘at

 

I was nervous at first

Had no clue about mining

I expected rocks to be sparkly

With gold, they’d be shining

 

But that’s not the way it was

The gold isn’t everywhere

IT’s dark, scary and wet

And it stinks like shit down there

I went down anyway

Cause I wanted to make mad cash

I realized if I wanted to blend in

I needed a big moustache

 

The mine was confusing

It sure baffled this lady

Wait, did you 8890

Or 8980?!?

 

It was so dark

I could hardly see

I swear some of those walls

Jumped out in front of me

 

A few of those dents are mine

This to you I confess

The only thing I had going for me

Is that I’d pass the piss test

 

9550 isn’t stocked up

And 8790 is too far

Brought the boys resin

When they were looking for rebar

 

I didn’t wanna come back

I felt like a tool

Dad said I had to

He wouldn’t pay for school

 

But I’m glad I came back

It woulda been a loss

I now know what rebar is

And I drive that cat like a boss

Now I swear like a miner

With tobacco stuffed lips

And when I play poker

I leave with all the chips

 

I had a great summer

A memory it will stand

Got proposed to so many times

I can’t count on two hands

 

Not only was I lucky enough

To have a wonderful crew

But I was with both C & D

So I got to have two

 

But summer time is over

I’ve got to say goodbye

I’ve never concentrated so hard

On trying not to cry

 

Someone’s gotta take over my duties

In this San Gold plantation

Just clean up after all your boys

And put flowers in the refuge stations

 

Someone’s gotta help the environmentalists

With the saving of the earth

And someone’s gotta decorate the safety room

On Paul’s date of birth

 

Don’t forget to give James a hard time

About having no hair

I love all you buttheads

Take care down there <3

 

          – by Kourtney Kerelation